Tag Archive | doubt

Stop Thinking About It

When The Mind Is In Overdrive

When I’m outcome fixated I can’t see beyond
The most unfulfilled present. My thoughts turn to things
That I don’t want and never have. What I must do
Is to alter my thinking, if only I knew
How to do it effectively. But my mind clings
To the now which is past tense where turmoil is spawned.

The cycle become vicious, I learn through its pain.
My receiver must be tuned to the frequency
Of the righteous transmitting of infinite grace.
Every bit of the whole process I must embrace.
Forever on the leading edge of what’s to be,
How can I stop resistance for maximum gain?

Energy that creates worlds is flowing through me.
Why rely on someone for the life I desire?
I create my experiences while awake,
Yet unconscious of many wrong paths that I take
On the way to fulfillment, wisdom I acquire.
Thoughts I think must align with who I want to be.

The process of achieving must entertain doubt.
The resistance it offers may cause me to think.
“Show me, then I’ll believe it.” It works not that way.
“Just stop thinking about it throughout the whole day,
Then with infinite forces, you’ll be well in sync.”
I can know that in good time, good things will work out.

The Dance With Disaster

The Detergent Duo

Can the hell I’ve created be worse than the one
In the service of Satan? Is my world the same
As the one that I’m meant for, if it does exist?
If indeed I am not there, am I sorely missed?
My unnatural acting has caused me much shame.
Terrified of the tango, I feel it’s begun.

My true self is the partner who wears a disguise
To prevent me from knowing from where lessons come.
Knowing whence they came leads to the easy way out
Of experience needed. While flailing about
On the dance floor of life, I know not where I’m from,
Which, to my knowing partner, is not a surprise.

This is all about feeling the best that I can
Through the world of confusion and eminent doom.
Interaction consensual cannot dissolve.
The exchange of emotion can only evolve
To a worthy performance inside the ballroom.
Guidance comes through my partner. I don’t have to plan.

Chronic is such a topic as personal pain,
But I feel it’s my duty to get it all down
Where the whole world can see it and be entertained
Or enlightened. My purpose will have been attained
In the long run. I can’t dance while wearing a frown.
If I get myself through this, there’s so much to gain.

About Sleep

Nocturnal Flight Of The Spirit

An addiction to sleeping…? Why not a disease,,,
To be unconscious one third the time I am here
Should be called my existence? It fits like a glove.
In my dreams, like a free bird, I zoom out above
Where I can’t when I’m wide awake in constant fear
As my life quickly wastes away and no one sees.

It’s at worst therapeutic. The cycle of sleep
Has a three quarter rhythm like some poetry.
It’s the nearest escape hatch without absolute
Departure from the physical. Rather acute
Is my life situation. Where I need to be
Is far off from where I am, so my soul does weep.

Meditation and sleeping are somewhat the same.
They both bring much relief from the troubles at hand.
As each is made available, there is my chance
To remember that I am not my circumstance.
Terminal, though it seems, may it help me expand
Far beyond a solution to mitigate shame.

I rely now on guidance. I’m on cruise control.
Things I do throughout my day I don’t think about.
Mindfully automatic with each daily task
With no judgment from me, I do most humbly ask
That I live through my hell with no measure of doubt
That redemption is possible for my damned soul.

Healthy sleep is wellbeing of body and mind.
I have more energy, and my mood can remain
At a workable level. If I were ok –
Like no one on this earth – I’d have nothing to say.
I exist to express things, and it keeps me sane
And conscious of the moments when I’ve been unkind.