What has happened to me that I now realize
All the sins I’ve committed? Perhaps it’s old age
Telling me that my time draws closer by the day.
Do I have enough time left to properly pay
My way out of existence? Of late I engage
In self-evaluation before my demise.
Words don’t teach. Life experience is the only
Way to know life. I’ve learned that I know not a thing
About living except that my own life has been
Cataclysmic. There are those who would shout, “Amen!”
To my honest admission. On slim hope I cling
That a way out of this dilemma there must be.
And there is a way. All that I’ve done in the past
Is the past. I can’t change it. So I have to choose
To look forward where there’s at least a chance that I
May turn into an innocent kindhearted guy.
That’s a bit of a stretch, but I’ve nothing to lose
In believing that I was never an outcast.
Then what was I? A bastard? A son of a bitch?
Or maybe just a troubled soul with some issues?
What matters now is that now is most important.
Dragging the past into it is something I can’t
Let myself keep on doing. Myself I abuse
When I do that. Besides, it will not make me rich.