Tag Archive | longing

If Tomorrow Starts Without Me

Welcoming Death

Tomorrow starts without me. Someday it shall be.
Should the sun rise and find your eyes dampened with tears,
Please don’t cry while you’re thinking of those things unsaid.
I know how much you care for me. Tears that are shed
Speak for you and me also, and I have no fears
For a place has been readied in heaven for me.

If it should start with out me, know that what’s occurred
Is that my name was called. Then, taken by the hand,
I was told I must leave earth and all that I love
And ascend to the kingdom of heaven above.
I cannot argue with what the Big One has planned.
As I looked back, a tear fell, and your voice was heard.

It seems almost impossible I’m without you
And can’t hug you goodbye. How I want you to smile.
Emptiness, memories, and sorrows I’ve become.
When I think of the things of the world I grow numb
At the thought of your sorrow. Yet after a while,
I rejoice in the new work I’m given to do.

And when I walked through heaven’s gates I felt at home.
God looked down upon me from a huge golden throne
And said, “This is eternity. All that I said
Will be yours is now yours. You have nothing to dread.”
I’m now ready to give up the earth life I’d known.

In the realm of eternity is where I roam.

Aster * Risk

A Perceivably Precarious Pickle

Everyone that I’ve ever know will hate my guts.
It’s a given. I don’t have to figure that out.
In the brief time that I may have left, I’m assured
That I will be the enemy. Those who’ve endured
My abuse will be thankful and gleefully shout
When I’m gone because I’m prone to driving folks nuts.

You do that to me also though. This quid pro squat
Leaves someone more shorthanded. This Risk with a face
Tries to mingle among the real thing and behave
In the ways of true stardom. No love can it crave.
Once The Risk is discovered, a quiet disgrace
Permeates like a wet fart that offends a lot.

In some ways I am like you colorful breeders,
But something fundamental is missing in me.
Clueless, I’ve sought a lifetime the answer to that.
Yet you normal ones know me, and this tit for tat
With the mind and emotions I play piss poorly.
In the game of relating, I’ve few cheerleaders.

So I’ll just keep on hiding amid you aster
Trying hard not to dis you inadvertently.
You and I spell disaster and should never meet.
I’m an old pissed off bastard who cannot be sweet
Anymore. It is bullshit as far as I see.
My true self is the one thing that I must master.