Tag Archive | isolation

Go All The Way

If you’re going to try, then do Go All The Way.
Otherwise, do not start the path laid before you.
It could mean losing girlfriends, wives, and relatives,
Or your means of support which most rarely forgives.
You may lose your clear mind and be left without clue,
And the more that is lost, the more hell there’s to pay.

Can you Go All The Way knowing all is unknown?
With each step of the journey is uncertainty,
It could mean your not eating for three or four days,
Freezing on city park benches, prone in such ways
That attract sharp derision and harsh mockery.
It may challenge your spirit and hurt to the bone.

It could mean doing jail time and isolation.
Aloneness is the gift. All others are a test
Of how much you can take. Do you want to do it?
You know well what the answer is. You cannot quit!
You will do what you must and be fettered and blessed
And despite the rejection, there’s work to be done.

Better than anything else you could imagine
It will be if indeed you are going to try.
Don’t be half assed about it. Do Go All The Way.
There’s no other feeling like a part in the play
Where you dance with the gods and flame up the night sky.
You will ride perfect laughter. New life will begin.

On The Brink Of Becoming

Jul8

Life gets pretty exciting as tightness gives way
To a lack of resistance. By one single thread
Does my wealth withered ego hang on to some thing
That will open the floodgates and easily bring
Tons of wealth headed for me. I’m sorely misled
By what life has to offer that I must obey.

Take your internet job search and stick it up where
Daylight never does enter. I’m not a damned slave.
I delight in my attitude being piss poor.
Suppose I interview you, you ignorant whore?
You are one third my age, and the way you behave
Is as if I’m some dipshit in need of a prayer.

“Get your sorry ass solvent, and pay your damned bills!”
Yes, I do get the message, but kindly fuck off.
Desperation is dangerous for all involved.
And the more I am fucked with, the less gets resolved.
I don’t feel like a creature that feeds from a trough.
I’ll avoid people judging me because it kills.

So, my phone remains unplugged. I’ll have no contact
With the world of disaster that I’ve created.
Well cocooned in my workspace, my value must grow.
I have asked for the universe, and I can know
What the world cannot tell me. I’ll rely instead
On belief in Becoming one who can attract.

Life Or Death

Jun1

It’s a matter of being – or not being here.
In one tenth of an instant all life could be gone.
Then what happens thereafter? Don’t go there so fast.
Though the grips of electrons at best only last
But a non-fatal flailing… do curse the new dawn.
Obstacles are withstanding. I can’t disappear.

Fascination I’m left with – it’s all that remains –
For the movement of particles… or anything
Well accustomed to light speed. I live for the spark
That gives honor to contrast between light and dark.
Only when it gets awful, destructive thinking
Leaves me languidly livid – the worst of all pains.

Living just for this moment, relief I do find.
Distraction from rejection is re-translation
Of the latter to loveliness, but at a cost
To the hurtful part of me who is rather lost
In this world become nasty beyond all reason.
Can creatures like electrons be known to be kind?

If ever the thereafter consumes my yearning
For the pain to be over, the present is one
That cannot be mistaken for past rotten deeds
Perpetrated in darkness for my selfish needs.
That I get to remain here, true justice is done.
On no thin thread of mercy I’m willing to cling.

The Saddest Lines

Mar19

I could write some sad lines with this sorry assed life,
And it don’t take too damned much to jerk myself off.
In some ways it’s a blessing perfecting the fool
So that love has a purpose to earn ridicule
From the sensible masses. The dog whistle cough
Is a thickness I cut through with my psychic knife.

In her heart she defeats me, and I know not why
In the midst of eternity now should occur.
Incremental dissolving of love not cared for
And forever unspoken I cannot ignore.
How I long for the sweetness of things as they were
Is the reason I can’t go for a second try.

Some unknown evil spirit has occupied me.
What has taken my feelings infiltrates the void
Where my heart felt at home once. The unwanted guest
Is the hermit made harlot at one with my nest.
Will I get myself back without being destroyed?
Time I have plenty of. I shall just wait and see.

I can write through the darkness as if it were light.
Make believe is an artform the whore understands.
Illusion may expel her or turn her into
A benevolent entity. These lines are few
And the last to be offered. Survival demands
That I learn, then move on with improvement in sight.

Trivial Pursuits

Jul7

It’s seen simply as trivial… all that I do
From sun up ‘til sundown and the time in between.
Though to me it’s important, and I shouldn’t care
That the gift that I offer is not meant to share
With any but this troubled self. Why am I seen
As the fool who does nothing? Am I ugly too?

If folks took me more seriously would I be
In this hellish predicament victimized so?
I suspect that the answer is all up to me.
I am friendly to no one because none can see
I’ve a genuine purpose. It just doesn’t show.
I’ve become quite embittered, yet who can agree?

Someone started a joke in the form of a game.
Too late into it I find no reason to laugh.
Maybe I’m not supposed to. I feel I should cry
While awaiting complete withdrawal when I die.
I came here not to play, so the best epitaph
Is a statement of substance to honor my shame.

People don’t want to know me or read what I write
Because I’m lacking something. Clearly I’ve no clue.
It remains a big secret to me yet it’s fun
To the world and its players. For me there is none.
I feel I’m being punished, but what did I do
To deserve the aloneness? Why am I uptight?

When depression evolves into anger it’s seen
As a worthwhile improvement. I’ve given up hope
That getting any better can do me much good.
I’ve been at life a long time. Its blatant falsehood
Leaves no meaning where I can successfully cope
With abject isolation in my sick routine.

The Magic Realist

A Poet's Path

Tag Archive | isolation